Loveless. Clueless.?

Being single is a wonderful and joyful season. It’s a God given gift, a blessing and season worth enjoying while the vision of marriage awaits.

Unfortunately, for some, it’s more like a curse or a season to be forsaken. But why would they feel this way? What are the factors affecting? Here are just some of the few:

  • They feel that they are left out, when all their friends are getting engage or getting married.
  • They feel alone, and needs a partner to be with.
  • For some, being in a relationship, makes them complete, it gives them value and identity.
  • Sadly, one factor is influence surrounding them. Most popular Filipino television shows , movies and media speaks too much of relationships and romance.
  •  Another factor is the peers. When friends and family you expect to empower and encourage you in your season, seems to devalue you by making fun of your singleness with endless teasing. They may not entirely be pressuring you into a relationship, but it does communicates it in a million ways.

Let me share to you some of my take home from the staff summit last October and my insights.

            Singleness is not  a purgatory  as if your waiting for heaven                                                                                        – Alex & Mitch Compton

Like what they have said, it is not a purgatory state, singleness is worth celebrating and rejoicing. When we are so fixed to being in a relationship or to getting married, it will not get you anywhere.


When we fail to see the value of our season, we fail to see and experience God’s wonderful gift for the season. It’s like rejecting a gift and wanting another. Everything is beautiful in its time. Maximize the season that is on your plate, or else you will miss out what’s given to you.

You are perfectly placed where you are, where God’s wants you to be. It’s not an accident. God knows exactly your every need down to the core of your heart and soul. Like Adam, He knows you need a suitable partner.

How are you going to be aware of the maximum value of our season? Here’s what Alex and Mitch Compton shared.

Intimacy with God is foundational and  fundamental, Set aside time to be with God, Time that you have right now is valuable. enjoy the season with greater delight and intimacy with our maker, There’s no way we can maximize our singleness aside from the presence of God. If we don’t have time now in word, prayer and spending time with our heavenly Father,  how much more when we have family and kids.

Develop and grew that relationship with Jesus. Out of our intimacy, God gives our identity. It’s not a man or woman  that can validate your being, only God.

As we grow in intimacy, God reveals to us his vision for the season. Our ability to hear Him clearly secures us in our season. As His word is forged into our hearts, we stand secure into his promises and to His unfailing character.

Leadership caught than taugh

We were invited by our senior pastor for an evening of dinner and fellowship at their place. I came early together with 3 more fellow campus missionaries. While we waited for the married once to come, we had one of the most empowering and liberating conversations with our senior pastor. He asked a question about our status, whether if we are single or in a relationship, we responded that we are all single at the time, with the vision of marriage. He then continued to share his testimony, He got married at the age of 32 and was able to travel different places and nations before getting married. 

His liberating words was, enjoy your season you have all the time now, because when your married you wouldn’t be able to do the things like you were  single. He said go and enjoy the ministry, travel to places you’ve never been. 

While he was speaking, I just felt so encourage that I have the best time now, and the joy in my heart to hear a very empowering words from him, this was a liberating moment. No pressure just enjoy your season, take your time, that was wow moment. 

Then the conversation shifted to savings , investments and insurance. It was a vision casting in preparation for greater things to come, have an emergency fund, have savings for travel, save for your marriage, believe for a car, travel abroad. When that moment comes you’ll buy that ring , or when you’ll get married you’ll easily be able to provide. 

3 things I realize about this… 

  • Leaders values your season
  • Leaders empowers you to maximize your season
  • Leaders communicates vision towards season

I thought to myself….

  • Do I speak of value of the different seasons of the people that surrounds me and to those that has been entrusted to me?
  • Do I encourage and empower them to maximize their season to the full?
  • Do I communicate vision more than communicating the current status?
  • Do I impart financial stewarship?

More than what was communicated about enjoying the season, I learned a leadership characteristic worth emulating.